Taking on Goliath (And Winning)

  Reflections Schizophrenia Bulletin, Volume 45, Issue 3, May 2019, Page 502 https://doi.org/10.1093/schbul/sbx186              Looking back there are steps in my recovery from mental illness that I was totally unaware of as I was going through them.   Recently I’ve been thinking about the positive steps in my recovery.               It began when I finally accepted my mental illness and became consistent with my medication.   I realized that this was how life was going to be.   I would have this illness for the rest of my life.   It would be up to me to have a voice in how my future would develop.             After I left the hospital for the second time, I went into a homeless respite for a period of time.   After being confined to a hospital I enjoyed this newfound freedom and...

  What to say and what not to say                         I guess it is a kind of intelligence to know what to say and what not to say. It takes a special kind of intellect to quickly understand if a stranger will understand or not understand. I have not necessarily mastered it, but I do my best to try to understand a new acquaintance.             I was born with a speech impediment. At a young age, I realize that some words I cannot say, because some people will not be able to understand. I figured I would be misunderstood. I was comfortable staying quiet. Luckily, I discovered writing, and quickly I learned this was the best way for me to communicate. My speech impediment was having trouble with the “r’ sound.             I may have gotten better with my s...

  Being Present in My Treatment             With my treatment I know I just can not wait to be complacent and actively involved in my treatment plan. I have to show my face and introduce myself to those who are part of my support team.             I have been in the VA system since about 2006. During that period of time, I have seen several different psychiatrists. Every time I get a new doctor, I have to reintroduce myself. In doing so, I want to present my best self, so I want to be seen as a person who cares. I try not to be late for the appointment, and I try to be patient with them as they get to know me and my mental health history. I realize I am not the only patient they see, and in most cases, they are over worked. I take a deep breath, share my past symptoms, and present symptoms. I want them to know that I am more than just a computer screen. I am more than a...

  A Vet’s Recovery Schizophrenia Bulletin, Volume 42, Issue 1, published 19 August 2015 https://doi.org/10.1093/schbul/sbv115   I have just passed my 15 year anniversary since being diagnosed with schizophrenia.   Where has the time gone?   Some battles are over after one skirmish, others last a lifetime.   When my diagnosis came,   my life was full of paranoia, delusions, and I was out of control.   I reacted to every overpowering influence with bizarre behavior.   The voices kept me isolated, on guard even when I was trying to sleep.   I was in control of a world that no one else could see or hear.   In truth, I was on a one way street that would only lead to my demise. The last ten years has not been easy.   There have been hospital stays, numerous medications changes, and major lifestyle changes.   All of that has brought me to today where I am in a state of constant recovery.   I am fully aware that recove...

 Pursuing Trust Schizophrenia Bulletin, Volume 46, Issue 2, Published 28 November 2018 https://doi.org/10.1093/schbul/sby173  In my opinion trust is the most important quality to have in any relationship. Whether the relationship is with a boyfriend, girlfriend, teacher or even an auto mechanic, trust should be established early on in the relationship.  For a mental health patient trusting your psychiatrist or psychologist is crucial in recovery. You don’t have to be best friends,  but you should be able to trust whoever is evaluating your progress.  How can you build trust with your doctor?  When I am seeing a new doctor I want to start building trust immediately.  Most of the time my psychiatrist inquires about how my medication is working for me.  He asks me if I am taking the proper dosage and if I am having any symptoms.  If I have others questions that I want to go further in depth about, I usually reserve those questions and commen...

  Senses or Schizophrenia  Schizophrenia Bulletin , Volume 43, Issue 4, July 2017, Page 684,  https://doi.org/10.1093/schbul/sbu192 My last appointment with my psychologist she showed me an article she found online. She seemed eager to see what my opinion was. I was able to read the first paragraph and then I tried to just skim what was on the page. One thing I got from the article was that someone found the map of DNA in schizophrenia. I guess went away thinking maybe they are close to a cure. Also I thought Pharmacology will probably drag their feet with it so they can make more money off the patients suffering with the mental disorder. My doctor was surprised I wasn’t as surprised as she was. The article was blurry and it was hard for me to understand. On a good day I would be able to understand. My doctor thought maybe I needed glasses. She handed me hers, and I put them on. The article was even more blurred. I quickly took them off. “You might need to mak...